In Process

I’m sure I’ve said it before, but I’ll say it again. I am constantly looking to grow, change, and improve. I don’t want to stay the same all the time. That seems like such an awful thing.

I’ve already changed and grown a lot, whether it’s from high school, or even just last year as a student teacher. Growth is a continual thing.

Now I’ll be the first to admit that growing is not a straight line. Some days you feel like you can do anything, and others you feel stuck in a rut. It’s a process.

I’m in process. I’m growing, overcoming, and learning. But I’m not perfect. I face setbacks, stress, and obstacles that are difficult to overcome. Some days it’s hard for me to get out of bed.

I won’t lie. February was a lot for me. There was a lot going on all the time, I was very stressed, and I felt like it wouldn’t end. But my brain is finally able to process it and I’m moving forward. Progress isn’t always amazing, but I’m continuing. I’m in process.

Maybe you’re in process too. You’re working and growing. And even if it doesn’t feel like there’s any improvement, it’s important to keep going. Truthfully, you should always be in process. There’s always things to learn life always has lessons to teach. Things shape you, mold you, and change you no matter your age, color, job, or any other factor.

Life isn’t a video game. You don’t reach a maximum in stats and just stop. You’re continually growing and getting better. So when you’re in process, like I am now, recognize that you’re gonna change and grow through this.

I don’t know what you’re going through. You may feel fine and that you’re not “in process” at the moment like I am. But maybe it’ll come. And maybe it’ll be a positive thing where you know you can overcome it right away and immediately improve. I hope so for your sake because that would be awesome! But more often than not, when something comes, it’s something that knocks you flying back. It can be so difficult to get back up, but trust me, you’re not going to get anywhere very well by staying down.

I know it’s hard to move forward when things like that hahappen. The best way to do it is to start small. Start with something you can control. For me most recently, I wrote down everything that was bothering me. It stirred up a lot of pain, but once I did that, I was able to easily see it all. I then wrote an encouraging letter to myself reminding me that I’ve done it before and I can do it again. I was so exhausted when I got home that I took a nap. When I woke up, I was able to get some exercise. I also took a shower when I got home. These are all small things, but they’re enough. I didn’t feel like I was under so much pressure.

I’m still growing and working, and that’s okay. It’s a process. And I know that I’ll come out better than I’ve ever been before. So I’m working and accepting that I am in process.

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